Chapter 25: I have a Voice


Chatty. Loquacious. Opinionated

However you put it, I was born with the innate ability to talk… a lot.  I public speak all day in front of my students, I give workshops around the province to fellow teachers, I will bring conversation to a silent room.

Contrary to my natural born tendencies, I am still learning to give voice to my own true, wants, needs, and emotions. Recently I have began supporting a young woman as she starts her own journey of recovery. These conversations with her have brought to light the true fact that I still hide parts of myself; I lock away my stresses and anxieties, silencing my voice.

Why? Fear.

Fear of being REJECTED
Fear of being MISUNDERSTOOD
Fear of being a BURDEN
Fear of being deemed NEEDY
Fear of being seen as TOO EMOTIONAL or DRAMATIC

This is a strong, but a false narrative I have chosen to hold onto, one I am working to erase and rewrite. Just as I have put the work in to be love my physical self, I must also put the work in to love and appreciate my emotional self.

These FEARS hold my truth captive, taking value away from the voice and freedom they provide me. Although my rational side holds strong to the belief that I am not able to control the actions or reactions of others, just of my own, my insecurities hold onto ‘assumed’ responses. This assumption, unfair to both myself and to others.

I am setting forward with the outlook that regardless of actions or reactions towards my truth, that it is something worth being shared and heard – I know from experience the freedom that comes with speaking my truth.

Take a moment today to reflect on what parts of yourself you silence out of fear.
What can you give voice to today?
What part of yourself can you honour?

About sedalzell

Educator & Explorer
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